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What school failed to teach us...

1. Why is the alphabet in order?

2. If a car traveled at the speed of light would the headlights work? 

3. If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?

4. What's another word for Thesaurus?

5. How can there be self-help 'groups'?

6. Do they give pilots crash courses in flight school?

7. Why are there 5 syllables in the word "monosyllabic"?

8. If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happen if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?

9. Why isn't the word, 'phonetically' spelled with an ' f '?

10. Why is the third hand on a watch called the second hand?

Quotes from Steven Wright